Lucilleidi

And I don’t know why but it happens that suddenly I feel in need of writing in English. And I know that It would be much better, it would be much more expressive, it would be artistically more interesting if I write in Italian but it’s becoming hard to translate and translate and to switch from Italian into English passing through Spanish and Portuguese and we’re totally lost in these translations, we’re totally lost and totally quiet and every time you speak and you listen you know you’re losing something, something you’ll never get ’cause it’s in the words that have no exact translation it’s in the expression it’s in.
Bits of reality  that we lose while trying to show to explain how we are what we need.
And in these secret holes where pieces of reality fall suddenly it happens that you find something you believed lost.
I’m starting to measure my feelings with the meter of my English. Nobody will understand how I feel if I’m not able to explain it. But perhaps if I can’t explain it , the thing, this thing, doesn’t exist anymore. We take it easy. We learn patience.
We learn to understand that sometimes we don’t understand.
And it seems to me that this one is the biggest revolution. You go to school everyday and nobody tells you that it’s easy but everybody is doing exactly the same. Everybody is homesick, everybody is tired, everybody is doing a whatever job and everybody arrives at the end of the day with too many things left to do. everybody speaks English, but we’re not in the advertisement of   coca-cola,  we’re not smiling with our lighter on while singing in magic harmony.
And sometimes I just get fuckin’upset because I understand that there’s something I don’t understand and I know, no matters how strongly I try, I know there’s something I won’t be able to explain.
No matters how hard I study, errors come out from my mouth and most of the times I don’t even realize how many mistakes I’m doing.

One day you wake up and suddenly you understand what it means. To be lost in translation and to take the risk and stay.

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